Impeccable parenting is visible to the naked eye, and this asset is priceless. No matter how much they say that men prefer “hot things” and “bad girls,” everyone knows: this is a cheap authority for an hour, few people dream about it. She herself has always been and will be an exquisite woman. Therefore, there are as many as you want to become the “first lady” or at least adopt the style.
If there are no counts or princes in the family, you have a regular school, a university, and so on, and outside the window there are views of the Russian hinterland - it’s okay. Ladies are not born, they are made. And often on their own, without parental guidance and control. The main thing is a great and sincere desire to change for the better in order to become a real lady.
How to be a lady
In a mirrored surface: a real lady's wardrobe
It’s worth starting with, because people are greeted based on their clothes. Let’s outline the main milestones in dotted lines, and the first on the list are classics and quality. It is clear that the wallet does not always allow the lady’s “habits”, but there is a way out. Buy a few things, but wisely: this is the case when a new thing is “one good thing.”
- Do not follow fashion, which every season offers things that are difficult to combine with anything, your choice is a capsule wardrobe. Trying it on, adjusting the waist, searching for complementary colors, styles and textures - and the reflection in the mirror will always please you.
- Avoid rich colors like bright blue, red, and contrasting combinations with black. Elegance is inherent in a lady, which means muted tones are in favor, as well as light shades - they look more luxurious.
- Boycott thin knitwear, tight elastic fabrics, “natural” synthetics, faux fur and obvious leatherette: leave this to teenagers and more democratic young ladies. But at the same time, do not chase prestigious expensive things for which you will have to save for a long time with your income. Do not buy things, the loss or damage of which would be a real disaster for you. If you wear a white dress or like jewelry, they are not for you, which becomes noticeable to others.
- Also vetoed is exaggerated sexuality, that is, mini, deep necklines, provocative cuts, cutouts, any resemblance of things to underwear is undesirable. By the way, about underwear: the ideal option is flesh-colored, without lace or accessories. It is desirable to have a smooth texture, non-transparent and not visible along the contour through clothing.
- The so-called “beauty” is also prohibited. It refers to excessive improvement of appearance, which looks caricatured. Overly plump lips, overly long hair, an incredibly large bust on an overly thin body and other delights - we’re talking about this. Such girls are usually considered too well-groomed, and this is definitely not about ladies.
Finally, promote neatness as an end in itself. Don’t be afraid of literally polishing the appearance: everything is perfectly fresh, polished, fitted, of high quality. But not conspicuous.
“Oh, what manners!”
A lady has the ability to speak competently, look her interlocutor in the eyes, smile sincerely and demonstrate her interest. No one cares what your mood is, whether the topic of conversation is close, whether your counterpart is impressed or not. Ladies always keep their face, both in personal communication and in business. Be sure to learn how to conduct small talk about nothing, the purpose of which is to facilitate communication.
"Calm, just calm"
Restraint is the foundation on which the image of a lady rests. No matter what happens around you, you must not go overboard: “What if I am insulted, offended, provoked?” - a reasonable question will sound. Reply to: Leave silently.
Aggression, direct or veiled, is the main enemy of the way of life. Having decided to develop in this direction, you do not have the right to criticize others, arrogance, undisguised snobbery and statements in the spirit of: “I can’t stand people.”
Not a word
Do you want to be considered a truly attractive woman? Avoid languor, mannerism, arrogance, disdain for service workers, and constant dissatisfaction with what is happening and those around you.
Don't tell the world about your special love for animals. Smart people know that declared love for our smaller brothers usually goes hand in hand with terrible attitudes towards people. This is also evidenced by stupid coquetry and hints of exclusivity.
No charisma? Let's fix it!
To become a real lady, it is not enough just to refrain from negativity and chatter socially; you need charm and charisma. Don't be afraid, you can handle it.
In this case, charisma refers to what you are able to give to others. For example, you can give them your attention and show interest in them. This is both simple and understandable, but at the same time difficult to implement for many people. As already mentioned, learn to listen to your interlocutor.
Also, charismatic individuals tend to be optimistic and cheerful. They radiate positive energy, to which others are attracted, while pessimistic, dissatisfied, indifferent people want to. Charming people have many other qualities, but these two are liked by almost everyone.
The main secret is that these magical qualities can be played out. Just don’t confuse them with pretense. Gradually get into the role and make it second nature.
Etiquette made easy
Since you are not a recluse, you will have daily contact with the outside world. This is a constant test of how much you have transformed. Let me give you some tips on how to appear in the best light - no matter who is in front of you, you are trying for yourself.
- Phone away
One of the most unpleasant things to do these days is to receive calls and SMS messages during a conversation. Especially with the words: “This is important.” In this way, the interlocutor is made to understand that communication with him is considered less significant. And, of course, you should not talk loudly in public transport, in a store, or when paying at the checkout, that is, making those around you unwitting listeners.
- Politeness and politeness again
Not exaggerated, not ostentatious, but sincere. It is implied in communication with everyone, regardless of social status. It is especially important to be polite with employees in the service sector: waiters, beauty salon workers, etc. An arrogant tone or, conversely, a pointedly patronizing caress in your voice will nullify your lady asset.
- Down with inappropriate coquetry
All over the world it is not customary to be ashamed of age, so support this wonderful rule. And stop making excuses for the number on your passport. Please eliminate from your vocabulary the phrases: “I’m XX, but I look younger,” “Everyone gives me five/ten/15 years less,” “I’m mistaken for my son’s/daughter’s older sister.”
- Do not skimp on apologies
Difficult situations happen at every step, you are late, accidentally push passers-by, drop something in stores. Even if it's not your fault, always apologize. This is not weakness or cowardice, it is an indicator of good upbringing. It doesn't matter who is to blame. An apology is a social mechanism for facilitating communication and also disarms the opponent. And the search for those responsible, as a rule, only leads to a quarrel.
- The art of being a guest and hostess
Compliance with etiquette consists not only in punctuality of visits to events and mastery of salting utensils, but also in the ability to lead, being moderately delicate and sensitive. The art of receiving guests at home, being a hospitable hostess who knows how to entertain visitors and diplomatically managing any difficult situation will require even more attention, which is ideally best avoided.
Despite the fact that the concept of “lady” in the modern world seems quite outdated, it still reflects certain feminine qualities and aspects of behavior: elegance and taste, style and manners, respect for oneself and others, the ability to communicate politely and delicately with people .
A lady is more a state of mind than an empty external gloss. To become a real lady, first of all, you need to start treating yourself like a lady, bringing all your actions and deeds into line with this state of mind, then those around you will not hesitate to treat you the same way.
We invite you to study simple rules that true ladies all over the world strictly follow.
Mom, of course, told you what good girls should and shouldn’t do, but even if you follow these rules, you won’t become a real lady right away. But you can try? All you need is desire, self-confidence and perseverance.
On this topic
First of all, a real lady is not characterized by laziness and a negligent attitude towards herself. Remember Jacqueline Kennedy, Grace Kelly, Audrey Hepburn. Hardly anyone doubts that they are real ladies. And if you want to be at least a little like them, you should listen to our advice. So, a true lady is a combination of external and internal qualities. A slender beauty with an impeccable hairstyle and shoemaker's grip is not a lady. Just like a well-read gray mouse with three honors diplomas. Therefore, to become a real lady, you should work not only on your manners, but also not forget about your appearance. So, a true lady should not:
Look defiant
On this topic
A real lady does not need to attract undue attention to herself with hair color, frilly jewelry and tight clothes. As for your hairstyle, naturalness and neatness are your choice. Don't skip visits to the hairdresser and watch what's on your head. Even a strict bun can be elegant if you use hairpins and not a funny children's elastic band. Massive flashy jewelry will make you look like a gypsy who has nothing in common with a sophisticated beauty. Choose classic solutions: small studs with diamonds or neat earrings with pearls will help you look luxurious under any circumstances. A black bra worn under a light chiffon blouse, the hem of underwear sticking out from under the trouser belt, or a tacky print on a dress will also not add elegance. Dress discreetly and nobly: a little black dress, a string of pearls and classic pumps are a classic of the genre.
Treat yourself carelessly
Smooth white teeth, glowing skin, toned body, neat manicure, shiny hair - all this is proof that you are taking care of your health. And this is an integral part of the image of a lady. Some might argue that it takes a fortune to keep yourself in order, but this is not true. Brushing your teeth twice a day and flossing is a simple but very beneficial habit. As well as giving up fast food in favor of chicken breast and vegetables. Well, you can do a manicure yourself, the main thing is regularly.
Wearing inappropriate clothes
Throw away all the things that have become unusable: old jeans, faded and out of shape underwear, a sweater with pills. Even if no one notices a small line on your tights, it will undermine your self-esteem. A true woman will never wear a turtleneck with a stretched neck or a faded blouse. Clothes that don’t fit your figure are also unlikely to make you the queen of the evening. Therefore, when buying your next dress, pay attention to the cut: the new thing should fit perfectly. And no excuses like “well, there will be an incentive to lose weight.” If you lose weight, buy something new! And not just one.
Abuse alcohol
A true lady always thinks about how she looks from the outside. Crowded eyes, unclear speech and confused movements will definitely not add elegance to anyone. Therefore, whether at a get-together with friends in a bar or at an office party, watch what and in what quantities you drink. And since no one is immune from annoying mistakes, always have a snack before events. You’ll feel like you’ve had too much, -. But, be that as it may, do not impose it on others, listen to other people’s words: it will broaden your horizons. And don't get started! A loud, harsh voice will instantly turn you from a sophisticated woman into a market trader - watch your speech. Disrespectful behavior and rudeness are uncharacteristic of a true lady. Be modest, but maintain your dignity, no matter who you communicate with!
Text: Natalia Orekhova
The laws of etiquette are quite simple once you understand them. And everyone can master these rules of behavior.
We have collected modern rules of etiquette that you need to know in order to earn the respect of society and make your life comfortable.
When guests come to you
- If you have a guest for the first time, first show him where he can clean himself up, and then invite him to join the company.
- If guests brought you drinks or treats as gifts, they must be placed on the table so that everyone can enjoy themselves.
When you come to visit
- If you urgently need to leave the party, all you have to do is call the hosts of the party and apologize for having to leave. At the same time, you should not say goodbye to the rest of the guests - this way you will introduce discord into the general fun and hint to the others that it is time for them to leave too.
At the restaurant
- If you feel stuffy, you shouldn't wave a napkin in front of your face. Just tell the waiter that you don't have enough air, and they will turn on the air conditioning.
- Under no circumstances should you display your entire makeup bag in a public place.
- If you need to comb your hair, this should also be done in the ladies' room. This is where the need to redo your hair will take you.
- You can apply lipstick right at the table, but you should only use mascara or powder in the toilet.
Rules of communication
- You should not address a stranger on the phone using a first name, even if it seems that the child answered: the impression may be wrong.
- You should not forget about the rules of etiquette at home. For example, when communicating, it is very important not to shout from one room to another - this is at least indecent. In addition, this manner of communication can become a habit and create a bad impression of you.
At the table
- It’s not nice to top up the bottle only for yourself. Taking a bottle or decanter, first offer it to your neighbor at the table.
- It is impolite to choose the best from the portions on the platter. Take the piece that is closest to you.
- A spoon from soup should not be placed on the table - neither during a meal nor after it. Leave the spoon in the plate so as not to stain the tablecloth.
- The cup of tea should be held by squeezing the handle with your fingers. You can hold a cup of coffee with your finger behind the handle.
Are common
- Remember that at work you should not put a handbag on the table, put a hat on it or lay out cosmetics on it. Find another place for all this.
- If you are sitting in a low chair, do not cross your legs. Instead, press your knees together and tilt your legs to one side. You can cross your legs, placing one foot directly behind the other.
Wardrobe in a public place
- If there is no wardrobe where you come, outerwear must be hung on special hangers indoors.
- At the wardrobe, you can straighten your hair in front of the mirror, but you cannot put on makeup or comb your hair, or re-tie your tie - there is a toilet for this.
- In some cases, it is quite acceptable for a woman to sit in a raincoat, but this rule does not apply to men.
- If there is a wardrobe, all bulky luggage is left in it: umbrellas, bulk bags, cases (if there is nothing important in them). However, the handbag must remain with the owner.
Etiquette in the car
- When a woman gets into a car, she does not “step” into it. It is enough to sit on the edge of the seat and then “pull” your legs into the car. And, conversely, when getting out of the car, place your feet on the asphalt, and then get out of the car.
Many people believe that a real lady can only be born. But in fact, the ability to be one takes years to develop. In order to become a lady, you must not only remember the basic rules of behavior and appropriate lifestyle, but also fully follow them.
Manners of a real lady
A real lady will never allow herself even what an ordinary average girl with a good upbringing can sometimes afford. What should a real lady be like? Here are ten key behaviors:
- A lady will never allow herself to chew gum and swear.
- The lady doesn't fix her makeup in public. She will appear in public in impeccable form.
- The lady does not allow her emotions to get the better of her; she is always restrained and confident.
- The lady does not discuss other people, does not brag about her achievements and does not talk about intimate relationships in society.
- A lady does not communicate with people depending on their status. In communication she is equal with everyone.
- The lady is distinguished by her constancy, so one-night stands are not for her.
- The lady talks little and listens a lot. She does not allow herself a high tone of voice.
- The lady behaves with her man with dignity, without showing off her personality. She easily allows him to communicate with his friends.
- A lady is never interested in a man's salary on the first date.
- The lady is always proud, but not excessively. She never imposes her persona.
The code of a real lady also includes features of a girl’s appearance:
- Too short skirts and deep necklines for ladies are taboo. It has exquisite taste.
- Smoking is something incompatible with the lifestyle of a real lady.
- A lady's gait is always graceful and light.
- Haste is not for ladies. She always does everything calmly and measuredly, but in a timely manner.
If you think that the rules of a real lady end with this list, then this is far from true. The lady is educated, she is an unrivaled mistress of her home. In addition, he is well versed in art and loves horse riding. She is musical - she loves music and dances wonderfully. Like a true woman, a real lady has a luxurious flower garden and takes care of it herself.
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To become a lady, a girl should first learn in theory what this term means and what qualities a real lady should have.
Who is a lady by definition...
“Lady” - this is how the British used to politely address a married woman in bourgeois society. Initially, a lady is the wife of a lord. As we understand, from there the tradition of calling “lady” those girls and women who possess traits, patterns of behavior and style that were once characteristic of the wives of English nobles has passed into the modern world. And today “blue” aristocratic blood has nothing to do with it.
A set of qualities of a real lady
To understand how to become a lady, and to get closer to this image in reality, you must strictly adhere to the following fundamental points.
Behavior
- The lady never swears or loses her temper. The lady is calm and calm in public, even if a hurricane of emotions and feelings is raging in her soul.
- The lady does not behave provocatively and cheekily. She is well brought up and knows how to behave properly in society.
- The lady never relaxes, there is like an unbending steel rod inside her, she will not get confused in any situation. Even being in a difficult provocative environment, the lady will show her composure, intelligence, and calmly and confidently make a quick decision. Her credo is to steadfastly and calmly withstand all the blows of fate. But do not think that the lady is a callous nature. Not at all, know moderation in everything. You can often see a smile on a lady's face! We repeat, the main thing is to know when to stop.
Education
Sorry, but without a good education, you won’t become a lady. This does not have to be a prestigious educational institution; a good education can be provided by both the family at home and an ordinary modern university. The main thing is the result of learning!
And the result is that the lady will be able to support a conversation on any topic, will be interested in news in different areas of our life (art, science, politics, literature, etc.), and will be considered an intellectually developed girl by those around her. A constant striving for perfection and self-development, even in home economics (if this is the wife of a socialite).
Style
A sense of style is an important feature that distinguishes a lady. How to become a real lady if you dress like a multi-colored parrot, and your wardrobe is considered bad taste! A sense of style is an innate human quality. But even if nature has deprived you of it, then be sure to listen to the stylish people around you, find an adviser and assistant in this difficult matter for you. Believe me, these rules apply to all ladies, of course, if you are not wondering how to become Lady Gaga :)
- A real lady is elegant.
- Her style is not always fashionable, but it exudes a certain charm.
- The lady dresses discreetly, but stylishly.
Etiquette
Knowledge of etiquette involves not only the ability to properly handle cutlery while eating. Etiquette includes:
- rules of behavior in society, at the table, at special events,
- the ability to receive guests at home,
- a sensitive understanding of what, to whom and in what situation you can say, and when it is better to keep your mouth shut,
- also understanding in what situations it is possible to smile and when it is necessary to strictly demonstrate equanimity.
Grooming
The lady is never lazy to take care of herself. A pleasant appearance is created precisely through proper care of your face, hair, body, and nails.- Always get your manicure done on time.
- Regularly use lotions and creams to care for your face and body. The skin should glow with health, it should be silky and soft.
- Hair is perfectly clean! Don’t be lazy to wash your hair or put your hair up if you have unruly, fluffy hair. How to become a lady if you are disheveled and your hair is fluffy in all directions.
- The makeup is not vulgar, but appropriate to the situation.
How to become a business lady
A businesswoman is a successful woman who has all of the above qualities. However, pay attention to some tips for a business woman...
- Punctuality!
- Correct prioritization: It is more important for you to think about a business plan or meet a promising candidate for a vacancy in your office than to go shopping with your friends.
- Know your limits in relationships with colleagues. Do not allow yourself to be treated informally. We understand that it’s very nice to work surrounded by friends, but someday it will backfire on you.
- Business suits, formal but modern and stylish dresses are your style.