Male psychology of cheating: why do men cheat? Why a man cheats: the psychology of male infidelity Borscht is borscht, but I also want soup.

Male infidelity is becoming more and more common. Women have more and more questions. Why did the man start cheating, how to explain his behavior and how to behave with a person who committed such an act? Male psychology is a mystery to women, many of their actions need explanation, and psychologists offer them after many years of studying the subject.

Historical excursion

Many explanations can be gained by tracing the historical aspect of male behavior in relationships. After all, social roles are very significant, creating an influence on behavioral reactions:

The beginning of society is the cave. A time when a man had to impregnate as many females as possible to survive. Moreover, the strongest and most intelligent male managed to do this, extracting his rights by all available methods. Is this why men are so proud of their victories among themselves? And many do not consider it necessary to carefully choose the means to obtain them.
With the formation of larger and more structured communities, the leader became an example to follow. Let's remember the patricians. Attitudes towards wives and slaves varied enormously. Could it be said that a man decided to commit treason if he had sexual relations with a slave? Yes, no one would have thought of that. Therefore, many men do not consider sex with another woman to be cheating.
Religion has made its own adjustments. The presence of such a phenomenon as a harem allows you to think about the possibility of maintaining not just sex, but also close relationships with several women. He met them in turn, was fascinated by everyone, helps everyone, pays attention. Is this treason? But the Horde conquerors walked around our territory for a long time.
Modern culture has lifted many prohibitions, including the prohibition of sexual pleasure for women. Unfortunately, not all men of reproductive age are able to give it, this is especially noticeable at the age of 35+. And the part of the population that is unlucky has no choice but to seduce wealthier men. But for most, sex remains a kind of reflex. But does this constitute treason?

Today, the law considers sexual relations with a third party to be adultery. But this concept was formed during the time of childbirth, inheritance of power. At that time, marital relations did not include close spiritual relationships; only the physical and material aspects were taken into account. And although officially such infidelity can become a reason for divorce proceedings, in practice many couples already look at the situation differently. Many countries have introduced changes to the legal system in this regard.

What should be considered treason?

With the development of humanity, its spirituality, and inner world, today this side is given a much more serious attitude, compared to the sexual aspect. Therefore, when considering male infidelity, it is worth carefully studying all the associated factors, and not dwelling on the presence of sexual intercourse with another woman.

If a man cheated, but at the same time sincerely believes that he loves his wife, never stopped listening to her words, provided financially, took part in the lives of his children, can we talk about a full-fledged betrayal? Rather, it’s about a misconception, a mistake, a misunderstanding.

You should take a completely different approach to physical betrayal if it is followed by neglect of the needs of the family.

What if the family is regularly neglected? The wife is insulted, the children are “raised” with fists, and the woman herself supports the family financially? Judging by the severity of the damage regularly inflicted on a woman and her children, this option can most likely be called treason. Unfortunately, the religious aspect interferes, interpreted in a strange way by our women. Often they sigh and feed the parasite who regularly drinks and insults his family members. But when she learns about a sexual relationship, the woman begins to feel insulted and humiliated.

Therefore, the attitude towards a man after physical betrayal should be deliberate. Rather, it is a litmus test that the relationship is starting to go wrong and it is necessary to pay attention to its condition.

Reasons from a man's point of view

Very often men do not consider that they have cheated. At the most, they may be afraid of women's discontent. Like a faucet that was not fixed on time or potatoes that they forgot to buy on time. This is all that a man feels after something committed, because:

he cheated out of curiosity, he was interested in how his wife’s friend would behave in bed;
wanted to diversify your sex life;
he was simply seduced, and he didn’t even understand how he ended up in someone else’s bed;
drank, did not understand;
loves to brag about victories;
I heard them boasting and did the act out of envy.

But there are also more serious reasons that indicate deep damage to family relationships:

a man cheats because he does not meet understanding at home, and found it with another woman;
learned about his wife’s misconduct and cheated out of revenge, deliberately causing her pain, instead of solving the problem together;
the guy cheated and confessed so that the annoying girl would leave him;
he is looking for another woman because the relationship with his wife does not suit him.

The psychology of cheating is complex. The reasons given are only part of the possible ones. Each individual case has its own aspects, and it is better to consider them with a specialist psychologist, and not with a friend, who, for her own reasons, can help the offense develop into a break in the relationship.

Signs

Sometimes a sexual relationship can last for years, and the husband will remain gentle and affectionate, caring, and thus a loved person. And this option can be attributed to polygamy, which you will have to accept together with your man. And someone else's.

But often men change their behavior:

happily leaving for work;
hiding information from your phone and computer behind passwords;
receiving SMS and calls in the middle of the night;
the number of business trips, delays at work, and night shifts is increasing;
improves appearance care;
sexual activity decreases (at home);
high spirits upon arrival home, which gradually gives way to irritation;
loss of interest in family responsibilities and common affairs;
neglect of wife.

In such cases, you should not get annoyed and make complaints, but try to clarify and change the situation. And signs of a man’s betrayal signal that it is necessary to deal with this immediately.

What to do?

How do you know there is a problem? Depending on the nature of the betrayal, this could be:

Accidentally. The guy or husband cheated regularly, or just once, carefully covering his tracks. This is the softest option. He says that relationships are valued. You need to think about whether it is worth raising this topic out loud at all, and if you do this, then with the desire to improve the relationship, and not to punish or make you feel guilty. At least try not to force the person caught into a situation that is hopeless for him.
The man admitted to cheating himself. We need to see how it behaves. If he was consumed by guilt and repented, that’s one thing. If he simply announces the fact without intending to hide anything, most likely the relationship has been controversial for a long time.
The guy left for someone else, and only then did it become known that he had been unfaithful. A loving person would never do this. If no attempts were made to improve relations or explanations, there is nothing to regret. It’s just that a mistake was previously made in assessing a person, his feelings and aspirations. Now it has been fixed and you can move on with your life with relief.

What to do if a guy cheated on you is not difficult to decide. Either leave her if she is ready to watch such a picture all her life, or send her away without coming to terms with the betrayal.

It is much more difficult if a previously loving husband, the father of the children, cheated, how to survive his betrayal. In this case, it is better to contact a family psychologist. Many couples go through this test, making their relationships stronger, more trusting, and better understanding each other's needs.

1. The woman is monogamous, the man is polygamous.
The most meaningless of all myths. Although the terminology is confusing, hinting at some kind of science, it sounds very simple: “A man can do it because he is a man, but a woman can’t because she is a woman.”

2. Real betrayal is spiritual, not physical.
Although not a single woman has ever become pregnant from a man’s spiritual betrayal, this myth is extremely convenient because the fact of betrayal in this case is, in principle, unprovable.

3. Cheating for love is not treason.
If now I feel love for another woman, then the main thing is not to betray my own feelings. We'll sort it out with my wife later. In the end, if my wife loves me, she should only be glad that I had a good time. But no, it’s her own fault, and that’s what she needs.

4. Cheating without pleasure is just an experiment.
My wife is still the best, and I cheated on her specifically in order to understand how much I love her. She should appreciate it and respect me for it.

5. Revenge as an excuse or “they brought me down.”
If my wife has turned into a bitch, tormenting me with her jealousy from morning to evening, then that’s what she needs. And what happened in the beginning – a man’s betrayal or a woman’s jealousy – is not so important.

6. Jealousy as an excuse or “betrayal out of fear.”
I love my wife so much, and I am so afraid of her infidelity that I simply cannot stand it if she cheats on me. It’s better that I do it first, so as not to go completely crazy if she does it.

7. Cheating ruins relationships.
Surely one of the women will sooner or later not stand it and leave... But even if the relationship with his wife has already faded away, the appearance of a mistress only gives it a new meaning - to keep him at all costs. “I put so much into it.” But it’s not so easy for a mistress to give up. “After all, it all started so well, and he promised. Maybe he was just confused? Did I push too hard?” Do not forget that the most stable chair is a chair with three legs.

8. Two women - double pleasure.
Well settled - both wife and mistress. In fact, he settled down very poorly. The euphoria from the novelty quickly passes, and in its place appears an oppressive feeling of guilt. In relation to his mistress too - after all, he gave her hope. Being loved by two women, one of whom you have to leave, is not a pleasant situation. Sometimes health problems come to the rescue. For example, problems with potency: “Leave me alone, don’t you see, I’m not in the know at all...”.

9. The problem is resolved when the man makes a choice.
Yes, but the wife is faced with questions: “Can I trust him now? Why hasn’t he fired his ex-lover yet? What if my mother finds out about everything?” If the choice is made in favor of his mistress, then she will think: “If he left his wife, then why can’t he leave me?”

10. He does not leave his wife because he loves children.
Never does a man’s feeling of love for his children manifest itself so clearly as during a “showdown” with his mistress. It is this that is presented as the main reason why he cannot leave his wife. In the most sophisticated cases, if the mistress is married and she herself has children, you can hear the phrase: “Darling, wait until your children grow up - don’t get a divorce so as not to traumatize them!” Some women even buy this, because for them children are sacred.

11. It will be easier for me if I tell you everything.
The main thing in a relationship is complete trust in each other, and the worst thing is deception. “I can no longer live in a lie. It’s unbearable to continue to deceive. If she really loves me, then she must understand how I suffer and forgive me when I honestly tell her everything...” About the fact that it is from this moment that the wife begins to suffer, For some reason, husbands forget at this moment.

12. It will be easier for me if I find out the truth.
Continuation of the previous myth about “honesty”, but from the female side. It all starts innocently: “We must trust each other. If you suddenly cheat on me, it’s better to say so right away so that there are no lies between us.” It ends pathologically: “Introduce me to her, it will be easier for me if I know with whom you cheated on me.” Since the mistress will turn out to be either prettier or worse, it will be unpleasant in every way. This has never made it any easier for anyone.

13. A woman will always feel if she is being cheated on.
All the talk about special “female intuition” is just naive attempts to take a man “on show off”. An excuse like “I bought condoms for a friend” will satisfy almost any woman. It is more difficult in the case of SMS like “I’m already wet.” Explaining why the boss talks about himself in the feminine gender, and where he got himself wet is not an easy task. But an experienced man can handle it too.

14. Men are like children, they don’t always understand what they are doing.
Men, indeed, are not always aware of their actions. Moreover, male infidelities often occur “drunk,” when it is absolutely not clear why girls could suddenly appear in the men’s sauna? But a wise woman will not bother herself with such trifles.

A fairly common problem for any couple is male infidelity, although psychology has already figured out quite a bit about the causes of male infidelity. In theory, any woman could study these materials and adjust her life in such a way that no signs of male infidelity of her spouse would have the slightest reason to even appear illusory, as psychology recommends. However, every beautiful lady believes that something like this will not happen to her. This is understandable, since marriage is killed by short-sightedness, conceit and lack of understanding that in a family it is simply vital to work with a family psychologist. As a result, dear ladies, you suffer from your own pride, believing that your relationship does not need a psychologist, because you can handle everything yourself.
However, in the end, after such a short-sighted family policy, before making a scandal and breaking up with your spouse, it is still worthwhile, since the situation has developed this way anyway, to still analyze it. They just don’t go to the left, everything has its own reason. And if a woman wants to maintain harmony in a relationship, she needs to understand the reasons for the betrayal. Psychology explains that any male infidelity has its reasons, so we now need to consider the reasons for male infidelity.

Psychology: male infidelity - emotions as causes of male infidelity
For most men, sex is not a manifestation of any feelings, especially if it is sex with an unfamiliar woman. There is no need to think that if your partner goes for a walk, it means he has fallen out of love. For a man, such contact means about the same as drinking beer with friends while watching football. Just keep this fact in your head. Realize the significance of betrayal in a man’s picture of the world.
There are a lot of factors for cheating, if you look from the emotional side, then there can be both sporting interest and curiosity in diversity. A man thinks that with another woman everything will be different. Sexual relations, on the side, for a man, are just a physical action that does not affect the emotional side.
Emotionally, men commit adultery because of a misunderstanding on the part of the woman. That is, a woman does not want to listen or just talk, and this greatly affects sexual harmony in a couple. Therefore, on the side, he will find a woman who will not only provide him with sex, but also give him mental relief.
Psychology: male infidelity - physical disabilities as causes of male infidelity
The main reason why the strong half of humanity commits adultery is dissatisfaction and lack of variety in sex, in existing relationships. If a man does not get what he wants in the family, he will most likely go looking for satisfaction on the side.
Taking into account the fact that today's society covers various types of sex and sexual life itself in quite a variety of ways, any man wants to try something new. Every woman within a family relationship should be aware of this fact. If you want a stable, reliable and harmonious relationship, then you need to visit a family psychologist and sexologist, that is, a specialist who will give the couple clarification about sexual life in marriage.
A woman’s sexual attractiveness is also very important, it’s worth thinking about this too. If everything was fine before, but now your partner is not happy with something, then it’s worth finding out what’s wrong. External attractiveness will completely influence a man’s condition in bed.
Psychology: male infidelity - midlife crisis, as reasons for male infidelity
A midlife crisis can also be a reason for cheating. In middle age, a man begins to realize his aging, and an internal conflict appears. The body ages, but the mind does not want to accept this. Therefore, in pursuit of youth, the partner goes to look for a younger woman, for sex, in order to prove that he is still young and full of strength. As a rule, in such situations, the mistress is much younger than the man.
Whatever the reason for male infidelity, you need to find out the reasons. if the problem is with the woman herself, then something should be done about it; if a man wants to cheat because of the psychological side, we need to help him. Well, if the betrayals are systematic, then it’s worth thinking about whether it’s worth continuing the relationship.

Seneca

Why do men cheat? I know that this question interests many women. He is mainly interested in those women who need a serious and long-term relationship with their beloved man, those who adhere to family values and consider betrayal an unforgivable act. And this is understandable, because for a normal relationship, the devotion and trust of partners to each other are of great importance. And betrayal is always pain, suffering and humiliation, and sometimes it is very difficult to survive. Therefore, women are not just concerned about the issue of male infidelity - they want to know how it can be solved. In this article I will explain why men cheat on their wives and what a woman can do to prevent cheating. Understanding the reasons for male infidelity and the ability to competently influence them will help many of you, dear women, build a reliable relationship with your beloved man or improve existing ones.

First of all, I want to draw your attention, dear readers, to the fact that not all men cheat on their women, despite their polygamous nature. And not only because they cannot do this, as some representatives of the fairer sex believe, who see all men as potential traitors, but also because of their convictions. Unfortunately, there are not very many such men, but they exist, and you should know about it. After all, male infidelity can have a lot of reasons with the help of which it is possible, in some cases, to justify, and in others to explain this act. But if a man himself does not consider cheating an acceptable act for himself, he will not cheat on the woman he loves and respects. But what kind of man is next to a woman depends on her.

True, in life there are much more often men who can cheat on their woman if they have a reason or reason for cheating. Below I will talk about the main reasons why men cheat, and you, dear women, be sure to think about how exactly your behavior can contribute to male infidelity. First of all, you really need to exclude your own mistakes, because of which a man could cheat on you, and only then look for opportunities to influence him, if at all possible. Keep in mind that there are some men whom you will never change - they have cheated, are cheating and will cheat on all the women with whom they begin to live. And if your man is just like that, then you can only come to terms with his infidelities, or leave him. And there are men who cheat on their woman largely through her own fault. In this case, a woman should pay attention to herself and her actions, her behavior with a man, her attitude towards him. And then, correct all those shortcomings that push her man to cheat. If, of course, the man is dear to her, and she wants him to be faithful to her. So, carefully study the reasons for male infidelity described below and then compare them with what was or is in your life.

Reasons for male infidelity

1. Tendency to cheat. A man's tendency to cheat depends on his upbringing. As I said above, there are men who cannot help but cheat, since cheating is part of their life for them. They change not only because they can change, but also because they want to do so. Communicating with such men, I realized that they cannot even imagine life without relationships with different women. Therefore, trying to instill in them other values is, if not absolutely pointless, then at least very difficult. You can, of course, talk about male nature, about male polygamy, which pushes him to betrayal, and we will talk about this below, but still upbringing in this case plays a very important role. By nature, we are inclined to different actions, but this does not mean that we need to do them all and then justify these actions with our natural essence. Therefore, it is appropriate to say that there are men who love to constantly have love affairs with women, and such men appeared not thanks to nature, but thanks to upbringing. For them, love victories are a way of life. Women call such men womanizers, and it is not difficult to recognize them - such men pay too much attention to other women, they cannot help but do it. If a woman gets along with such a man, then she should not count on his loyalty to her. If she needs it. It is important to understand here that if a person has formed exactly such an attitude towards relationships with the opposite sex and towards life in general, then it is practically impossible to change this person, at least without his own desire, or without urgent need. After all, people usually live as it suits them,
and not in the way it supposedly should, especially for someone else. Therefore, many womanizers have no desire to give up pleasure and live the life they want. Therefore, either do not get along with such men if they do not suit you, or do not demand from them what they cannot give you. But they can’t because they don’t want to. Remember that a scorpion stings because it is a scorpion, that is its nature. And male nature forces him to show attention to other women, like a male to females. And upbringing corresponding to this nature can cement in him an unshakable tendency to betray. This is when a man is taught from childhood that having many women is an achievement and a feat, that real men conquer different women, and are not content with just one. Therefore, the more women a man had and has, the better, the higher his value. Moreover, this is not only a man’s point of view, but women themselves can think so. Therefore, for some of them, male polygamy is the norm, since it is an integral biological quality of the stronger sex. A man with such convictions will not want to limit himself in his desires.

2. Pursuit of pleasure . You know, I pay special attention to this point, because I believe that pacifying one’s desires and appetites for the sake of both one’s own and others’ good is characteristic of exclusively prudent people. All people in this life strive for pleasure, avoiding pain; this is a natural desire for us. But you can strive for pleasure in different ways - you can do this by respecting the interests and needs of other people, especially close, dear, loved ones, or you can be a terrible egoist and think only about yourself. Now, when a man does not value the interests, feelings, needs and desires of his woman, his wife, thinking only about himself, about his interests, desires and needs, he is a real egoist, the desire for pleasure of which pushes him not only to cheat, but also to many other actions unacceptable for a woman. For example, to disorderly spending of money, to excessive drinking, to gambling, and so on. Many women who live with such men and with whom I had the opportunity to work said that their husband had become selfish. That is, you see, from their point of view, he was not one when they met, but became an egoist after some time. This really happens, for a number of reasons, I will not deny it. Too good a life relaxes a man, and he begins to allow himself a lot. But very often an overly selfish man can be recognized at the initial stage of getting to know him. You just need to pay attention to all sorts of little things in his behavior. And then it will be possible to see whether he is an egoist or not. Or rather, what kind of egoist he is - terrible or moderate. If you see that he is all for himself, everything for himself, everything for himself, that he often forgets about your interests and you have to constantly ask him for something, but he himself cannot guess about your needs - draw conclusions. Even by such seemingly distant things from relationships as frequent car changes, when a man constantly strives to buy himself a new, modern car, you can understand what his nature is. And it’s not about money, it’s about the desire for something new, better, which can be too reckless, indicating a person’s inability to appreciate what he already has. In itself, the desire for something new and better is a correct desire, but the form of this desire can be different. If, say, having a good, working car, a man exchanges it for a new one without any apparent need, seeking pleasure like a child, then why can’t he do the same with his woman, cheating on her for the same pleasure? You see, dear women, the maturity of the mind is determined, among other things, by a person’s ability to control his desires. Selfishness, in its unsightly form, is inherent in children, that is, in the immature mind. Children are also drawn to pleasure, without realizing where such a desire can lead them, and if they are not limited, they can, first of all, harm themselves. Only an adult, a man, must be able and want to limit himself, for the sake of a normal, stable life, for the sake of happiness with his woman. If he doesn’t do this, you shouldn’t be surprised at his betrayal and betrayal. There is little demand from children.

3. Desire to diversify your sex life. This desire is inherent in many people of both sexes. The only question is how strongly it manifests itself and in what form. Over time, everything becomes boring, this is understandable, but to maintain interest in life, in sex, in the opposite sex, in your woman or in your man, some kind of variety is necessary. A man especially needs this, because his masculine nature cannot accept monotony in sexual relationships. The Coolidge effect just describes the theory of polygamy in males; read about it to understand what needs are inherent in male nature. Therefore, a woman either needs to add some variety to her sexual life, or there is a high probability that a man will look for this variety on the side. In principle, if you approach this issue with imagination and enthusiasm, then you can diversify sexual relationships very well, and in such a way that it will be interesting and will bring great pleasure not only to the man, but also to the woman. There are many ways to diversify your sex life. So you can study them and take advantage of them.

4. Dissatisfaction. In part, this point is a continuation of the previous one, only in this case, a man’s sexual dissatisfaction can be associated not only with a lack of variety in sex, but also with its insufficient quantity and low quality. Also, a man’s sexual dissatisfaction can be affected by the simplicity of sexual relations, without, so to speak, sexual fantasies, which have long become the norm for our depraved society. These fantasies, in fact, there is nothing wrong with them, it is a kind of highlight in sex that affects its quality. It must be present in the relationship between a man and a woman, so that they are interested in each other and so that they are attracted to each other. Therefore, if there is little sex in a man’s life or it is not of sufficient quality, he may well be pulled to the left. But this is a fixable matter, unless it is a problem for the woman herself.

5. Lack of emotional intimacy. Sex is sex, but we are still people, not animals, so in addition to animal instinctual needs, we also have human spiritual needs, including spiritual intimacy with a loved one. From work experience, I can say that there are not many men who feel dissatisfied with their relationship with a woman due to the lack of spiritual intimacy with her, and therefore cheat on her. But they exist, so a woman must take this male need into account. In general, a woman who loves her man usually does not have problems with spiritual intimacy with him. Nevertheless, more attention should be paid to this point. Rare men who value a woman’s spiritual qualities are valuable in their own way, but they also have unique needs. Don’t forget to satisfy them and then such a man will simply have no reason to cheat on you.

6. The desire to assert oneself. This is also a very common reason why men cheat. This desire arises mainly among men with complexes and lacking self-confidence. Having no idea of themselves, they want to fill the inner emptiness with insignificant external achievements, seeing this as their only opportunity to become more significant, primarily in their own eyes, as people. But there are also men who do this out of conviction and even with a certain degree of aggressiveness, since they are confident that self-affirmation through numerous sexual victories is a manifestation of a man’s strong qualities. A man’s self-doubt and his complexes can be dealt with; a woman can do this herself, with the help of the right attitude towards her man, or by turning to a specialist who will tell her what and how to do. But with the beliefs that a man holds about sexual victories, with the help of which he asserts himself, things are more complicated. Here it is already necessary to change a man’s worldview, instill in him new values, and show him life from the other side. Not every specialist can do this. However, if a man himself recognizes the need to change his behavior, for the sake of his woman, for the sake of his family, for the sake of happiness, he can be helped.

7. Dissatisfaction with your life. Some men may decide to cheat due to dissatisfaction with their lives. In this case, a woman may have nothing to do with the behavior of a man, who, according to a number of other criteria, may rate the quality of his life very low. Hence, he has a need to improve it with the help of new sensations, new acquaintances, new relationships, new adventures. This is not a common case, but it is quite interesting, primarily because such a man can treat his woman very well, but still cheat on her. For such a man to stop cheating on his woman, his wife and generally stop being dissatisfied with his life, he needs to rethink a lot. In this case, the woman should advise her man to change, for example, his job if he doesn’t like it, or his place of residence if it’s terrible, in order to improve his quality of life and at the same time his own life. Then the man will not need betrayal as a means of consolation. However, if the situation is difficult, if he explains a man’s dissatisfaction with his life by dissatisfaction with his relationship with his woman, thus shifting responsibility for his, primarily internal, problems onto her, then it is necessary to understand this issue more thoroughly. After all, the same midlife crisis can affect a man’s vision of his life in extremely gloomy tones, which will not correspond to reality, but will nevertheless have a very strong impact on his behavior. And if a man is not able to clearly formulate his thoughts, explaining his dissatisfaction with a relationship with a woman - he cannot explain what exactly he does not like, what does not suit him, what he lacks in this relationship - it is better to drag him to a psychologist, by any means. Otherwise, such dissatisfaction may begin to manifest itself not only in betrayal, but also in other wrong and thoughtless actions.

8. Revenge. If there were actions in a woman’s life that caused great offense to her man, if she herself was unfaithful to him, then the likelihood that he will cheat on her out of revenge is quite high. But this can be avoided, or you can make sure that a man’s betrayal does not happen again because of this reason, and for this you need to start treating him very well, showing him your love and respect, and showing that you value him very highly, like a man. It is important that a man feels like a man, and not a rag on which to wipe his feet. Show him that you cheated on him by mistake, and not because another man was better than him. In this way, you can dissolve the resentment that has lodged in him, and then the desire to change in order to take revenge will disappear. In general, dear women, try not to make mistakes that could negatively affect your life, and in particular, your relationship with your man. I understand that this sounds somewhat banal, but you know, when a person often thinks about this - about the consequences of his actions, he begins to take them into account. Therefore, I believe that every woman needs to think more often about what this or that action will lead to before committing it. You just need to accustom yourself to this. Then you will not do anything for which your man will want to take revenge on you, including through betrayal.

9. Boredom. Sometimes a man simply becomes bored and uninterested with his woman, as a result of which he begins to be drawn to adventures on the side. This is one of the most common reasons for male infidelity, but I nevertheless believe that it originates from upbringing. Yes, living with one woman who, for example, is not interested in what a man is interested in, and also takes care of children all day long without paying enough attention to him, can become boring over time. But I can say with complete confidence that any life becomes boring over time, and making it interesting at the expense of causing pain to another person, I think, is unacceptable for a serious, cultured, educated person. In my understanding, boredom is not a reason to cheat, it is a reason to cheat. And if a man uses this reason to improve his life, but at the same time making it worse for his woman, this speaks of his low moral and spiritual qualities. If a woman is ready to put up with this, she can close her eyes to it; if not, she should think about a more worthy life partner.

10. Weakness. A man’s weak character, because of which he follows everyone’s lead, may be the reason that another woman will seduce him and he will decide to cheat. And if his woman, his wife, constantly pushes him around, having complete power over him, then he will cheat on her without any regret. Such weak men, of course, are disgusting, but often women themselves make their men like this, driving them under their thumbs. Those women who want to dominate their men go against the laws of nature. They kill the man in their men. On the one hand, this allows a woman to gain power over her man and achieve obedience from him, but on the other hand, she gets either an extremely homely man, practically incapable of anything serious, or complete squalor, the power over which can be seized by any more or less active woman. Therefore, I believe, I am simply convinced of this, that for a normal relationship, a man should remain a man, and a woman a woman. I understand that life today dictates its own rules, when a woman needs to take on male responsibilities - to support herself, her children and even her family, solve problems, and do other things for which a man is more suitable. It is difficult for such women to give leadership in the family to a man, especially to a man who does not even remotely resemble a leader. But there is no need to suppress such men. You can try to help them become normal men, there are such opportunities, but you don’t need to make a rag out of them and then wipe your feet on it. Today you wipe your feet on this rag, tomorrow another woman will do it, who will take this toy from you not without her, or rather his, consent. A weak man is greedy for everything, and so that he does not cheat, he needs to instill self-esteem so that he respects both himself and his woman, and does not allow anyone to interfere in his personal life, much less ruin it. And a depressed, humiliated, bullied man has no self-esteem - it is killed in him. He does not control external factors, they control him. Such a man can cheat, become an alcoholic, and do a lot of stupid things. And in general, there is not much benefit from such male individuals. So, dear women, think carefully before suppressing a man in a man, with the expectation that he will become a toy for you, which you can twist and twirl as you wish. Such a man, let’s say, can not only cheat on you, but also cause a lot of other troubles.

These, in fact, are all the main reasons for male infidelity that I most often encountered in my practice. We will talk about other reasons, less significant and less common, another time. For now, I think, these reasons are more than enough for every woman to be able to draw the right conclusions for herself regarding how she should and should not behave with her man, so that he does not have the desire to cheat on her. Also, a woman should think very carefully, and even better, consult with knowledgeable people about which man is best for her to connect her destiny with, taking into account her desires and plans for life. For not every man is capable of being what a woman wants to see in him.

In conclusion, I would like to say a little about what I see as the main problem of male infidelity and why it needs to be solved so that both the man and the woman feel good together, so that they are happy with each other. Everything, I believe, depends on people’s attitude towards life and what they want to get from it.

If a person professes family values, then this is one thing, but if a person professes free love and a lifestyle free from any obligations, then this is another. Each person has his own desires and goals in life. And, I believe, everyone needs to act based on these very desires and goals, without deceiving themselves and other people. If a man cannot or does not want to live a family life, which implies taking on certain responsibilities and obligations, then he does not need to get married, have children, and then run to the left, thus creating certain problems for his family. After all, not every woman can put up with this. There is no need to ruin the lives of other people, because you can live the way you want, with those who share your views on life. And a woman should also understand that there is no need to get along with a man who is not only incapable of being faithful to his loved one, his beloved woman, but also to live a family life in general. Well, some men are not suitable for this, whatever one may say.

And in general, we all need to remember that we are driven not only by our instincts, but also by our minds. Therefore, we need to learn to pacify our selfishness and not follow the lead of some of our desires, so as not to cause pain to other people, especially the people we love and care about, who trust us. So, if a man can cheat, this does not mean that he needs to do it. If he has a good, loving, respectful woman next to him, then by cheating on her, I think he is cheating on himself. He betrays not only her, but also himself and his happiness!

This word has many meanings, even within the realm of “cheating in a relationship.” For some, cheating means that a partner smiles at another person or communicates with the opposite sex. And sometimes we are talking about physical betrayal.

Adultery

This is a violation of fidelity in marriage, and therefore a violation of the obligations that are imposed upon marriage. But opinions differ on this matter, since the concepts of infidelity and its admissibility in marriage differ.

Statistics show: 90% of Russian marriages break up due to infidelity. This puts Russia on a par with the leading countries in adultery.

Despite the fact that women have made significant progress in having extramarital affairs (41%), men still lead in the number of affairs (59%).

Genetic causes of male infidelity

The prevailing social norms in most countries provide for monogamy in relationships. But from the point of view of scientists, a person is genetically located in the brain and there are separate systems responsible for desire, attraction and attachment.

Cheating from a scientific point of view:

Biologically, the reason why husbands cheat on their wives is due to the influence of dopamine. This “pleasure hormone,” produced during sex, allows you to experience positive emotions when the substance is released. The hormone is captured by dopamine receptors, which are divided into 5 types. Of all the types - D1, D2, D3, D4 and D5 - D4 is responsible for the tendency towards polygamy. If the receptor has a long form of the gene value, a person's tendency to cheat doubles. By the way, in women, the hormone vasopressin, associated with feelings of empathy and affection, is responsible for the tendency to adultery.
Instincts are another reason. Their goal is to ensure survival and reproduction. And to achieve the goal, you need to be able to choose the healthiest partner. It is worth saying that the female and male species have developed completely different evolutionary tactics for finding a partner. The female is extremely selective and strives to choose a genetically appropriate partner. And the male is unlimited in his choice, since, unlike the female, he can have an unlimited number of children.

In other words, a woman cheats on her partner if she believes that she can have healthier offspring with someone else. And a man tends to accumulate partners, since he is not biologically inclined to abandon women. That is, men are polygamous to the same extent as women.

Male infidelity: psychology

Sometimes - if a man is built and raised this way - there is no need for a reason for cheating. But in any case, betrayal signals that in most cases there is still a reason. Let's look at the main ones:

Discrepancy between partners in sexual preferences. People don't always think about it, but if one partner's sexual need is several times a month, and the other needs frequent intimate contact, disagreements between spouses are inevitable. When there are problems in sexual relations with his wife, a man can vent his energy on the side. In this case, extramarital affairs have no emotional attachment and are based more on a physiological need.
Diversity. When a couple lives together for a long time and bright feelings give way to a measured family life, one of the partners may become bored in the marriage. Especially if there is no joint search for something new in the relationship. In such cases, betrayal is a desire for adventure, for changes that could diversify a man’s life.
Alcohol is another common cause of cheating. In a state of intoxication, people are much more likely to make forbidden contact, even if their principles previously did not allow them to do so.
Low self-esteem. Sometimes a man gets married because he has a complex and wants to look self-sufficient and serious. His wife gives him importance in the eyes of society. And sometimes this is not enough. Seeing that other men are acquiring not only families, but also mistresses, a person dependent on public opinion may succumb to influence for fear of being different from others. The situation is dangerous because the man is not able to cope with the eternal fear of looking like a loser. In such cases, it is difficult to do without the help of a specialist, for example a psychologist-hypnologist. Baturin Nikita Valerievich.
Self-affirmation: suitable for those men who are experiencing difficulties with their careers and are trying to compensate for this deficiency with success in the love sphere.
Falling in love: if feelings for your wife have faded, you don’t want a divorce, but a new object has attracted attention, betrayal is difficult to avoid.
Female obsession: sometimes, even knowing a man’s marital status, women continue to seek his attention, and it can be difficult for a man who is not particularly principled to resist.
Revenge: a spouse may commit adultery in a state of anger, resentment, or a desire to take revenge for the humiliation experienced, hurt pride, or his wife’s infidelity.
Business trip: left alone, a man may not be able to withstand a long separation and find a replacement. Temporary forced loneliness is a test for some, but for others it is a real reason for adultery.
Lifestyle: In the case of a successful career, a man may consider the opportunity to have a mistress as a “reward”.

Is every man capable of cheating?

Research shows that this is not at all necessary. But there are some types of people who are prone to extramarital affairs.

As a rule, if a man is satisfied with the relationship, there is no reason to change. But there are types of people who cannot be faithful to one partner:

Actively interested in the opposite sex in all its diversity. This type of man cannot be re-educated. The priority for such a man will be his wife, who is unable or does not want to pay attention to his adventures. The main thing for him in marriage is comfort, homeliness and freedom of action. Such a “womanizer” does not know how to suppress animal instincts, and does not see the point in depriving himself of pleasure. He also does not bother choosing an extramarital partner, since he prefers to change them often. Education plays a big role in the formation of this type.
Those of weak character do not control the situation, as they easily succumb to hobbies, and often fall under the influence of a mistress with a stronger character. As a result of her manipulations under pressure, they may even get divorced.

Tendency to cheat by zodiac sign

It is impossible to accurately calculate how much depending on the date of birth. Depending on the circumstances, anyone is capable of deception. But you can make assumptions based on the character traits of a certain zodiac sign, and identify possible reasons for betrayal:

Aries are not fans of adventures on the side, if there are enough of them in family life. This energetic sign needs a strong partner in an official relationship, otherwise a passion for someone bright and interesting can happen on the side. Aries spends a long time comparing a legitimate object with an unstudied one, and it is better if the comparison is in favor of the first.
Infidelity is not in the nature of Taurus. Due to their earthly sign, such people are capable of committing treason for the sake of any material benefits or in the case of bad official relations. In a good marriage, Taurus avoid unnecessary affairs, giving preference to family values.
Geminis cannot be described as a permanent sign due to their changeable nature, hot temperament and love of adventure. Owners of this sign are extremely sociable and will rarely refuse the opportunity to flirt, but only resentment and a desire for revenge can serve as a serious reason for betrayal.
Leos are distinguished by their devotion and desire to create a family. However, if this does not work out, Leo can have several partners at once. This royal sign is particularly charismatic and masculine, so the basis for betrayal can be a lack of attention in official relationships. Leo is also very demanding: if he does not see a strong, feminine and faithful half nearby who would meet all his conditions, he is unlikely to settle on one partner.
Virgo rarely cheats, because she respects herself and her choice of partner. However, if the other half is systematically upsetting and disappointing, there is a chance that the virgin will find solace on the side.
Libras are romantics, and more often dream about something than actually implement it. The main danger in relationships with Libras is misunderstanding, which significantly distances them from their partner.
Scorpios usually maintain marital fidelity, despite all their sexuality. Everything here is determined by the presence of feelings. If a Scorpio really loves, there is nothing to fear. Serious reasons for concern are lies, since Scorpio does not accept this, as well as the lack of mutual understanding, close spiritual and physical connection.
Sagittarius is not constancy, since he is a fan of the “extreme” and a lover of new experiences. Therefore, this sign needs a person who can always surprise him. And, of course, Sagittarius will not tolerate restrictions in his freedom.
Capricorns are practical, hardworking, and rarely cheat. For example, if we are talking about benefits. However, in a family with Capricorn, differences may begin if the spouses do not have a common goal, or Capricorn is not satisfied with the material wealth of the other half. This problem is always fixable.
Aquarians are stable and do not like changes in relationships. However, they also want something new from time to time. If the other half completely ceases to suit the Aquarius, this will most likely lead to a complete break.
Pisces: the zodiac sign that will not cheat without love. Pisces do not tend to cheat physically - more often this happens emotionally, in the form of communication with someone, if the main relationship leaves much to be desired. This sign is prone to retreating into its own imaginary world, and is able to be content with only signs of attention from the opposite sex, not necessarily leading to betrayal.

Signs of male infidelity

In case of suspicions and doubts, there are signs that will help you understand if there is cause for concern. But it is worth considering that not all methods are reasoned and are an accurate guarantee of going “to the left.”

Sudden love for work. If your husband begins to stay late at constant meetings, regularly go on business trips, and actively participate in corporate events - this is a reason to think about it.
A sudden change in habits often coincides with a change in the object of passion. And if a ring periodically disappears from your spouse’s finger, which he forgets to put on every time, this is another reason to doubt his fidelity.
Telephone. A wife may suspect infidelity if her husband does not let go of the phone and has set a lock. Moreover, he tries to type messages furtively, hiding the text from his wife, and prefers not to answer calls in the presence of his wife.
Problems with transport - too much time began to be spent on correcting breakdowns in the car. Or the car wash has become too far from the house, and now it takes more time to travel.
Sudden interest in one's appearance. If your husband started going to the gym, he may have acquired external motivation. A sudden love for beautiful suits and new accessories will look suspicious. Especially if the partner suddenly fell in love with cleanliness, and began to take a shower immediately upon arriving home - perhaps this is done in order to hide the foreign smell that has become permanent.
Lack of sex. If there is less and less of him in the relationship, there is a possibility that his spouse is increasingly on his side. The emergence of new positions in bed can also become a reason for questions that will be difficult for him to answer.
Accidentally pronouncing someone else's name, new jokes, a way of expressing oneself, a constantly changing mood - this is typical for a person in love who transfers the behavior of the object of feelings onto himself. The spouse may suddenly become very thoughtful, or show too much of a positive, show-like attitude. It is worth observing the behavior of your partner, since signs of betrayal are very noticeable if the husband tries not to get caught.
Increased financial costs for unknown reasons. It would seem that nothing has changed in income, and in the event of a holiday or other event that involves spending, the wallet turns out to be not too thick. However, in this case, it is possible that the spouse is preparing some kind of surprise - a trip to the sea, an impressive gift, and the excitement is in vain.

Even the presence of one of the signs is not necessarily a guarantee of deception in a relationship. You should not so much look for signs of betrayal as you should make sure that the man is comfortable in the family and trust his intuition.

Why do husbands cheat but don’t want to leave the family?

reluctance to share property and pay alimony;
love for children - he does not want to deprive them of their father;
repentance and desire to make amends;
he is satisfied with a combination of factors such as family and outside relationships.

If in the case of the last option restoring the relationship is a serious problem, then in the first three cases the wife should think about

When a woman finds out about cheating, her first reaction is tears, scandal, threats, and rarely does anyone know how to restrain themselves and behave with dignity. And it’s completely in vain: in this case, it’s important to think everything over and try to remove all unnecessary emotions, step back from the situation and evaluate it from the outside. Sometimes it is never possible to fully recover from a blow, and it takes time to restore a healthy psychological state and requires the help of specialists.

You shouldn’t get hung up on the thought of cheating, no matter how strange it may sound. To calm down, you should try to repeat “yes, I cheated” many times, and from a dramatic situation it will become absurd, and you will allow emotions to take control of you.

It is necessary to analyze your own behavior and understand what you can change in yourself so that the husband understands that his wife deserves better treatment and is worthy of respect and love. In this case, it is necessary to clarify everything with each other, discuss what can be done so that the spouse can make amends and not need to have an extramarital relationship. Working on relationships should always be collaborative. You shouldn’t shy away from sex; you need to diversify your intimate life in order to bring back vivid feelings. If your husband wants to make amends, give him the opportunity to improve.

If feelings indicate that the relationship is in the past, and the spouse cannot be forgiven for his mistakes, there is no point in trying to save the relationship and maintain the marriage. It is better to give each other a chance for new feelings and a future.

People are much less likely to cheat if they communicate, share emotions and feelings, try to resolve conflicts that arise, and find time to spend time together. In a world of accessibility and permissiveness, it is important to remain faithful to principles and a feeling of true love.